Dredding going to the psychiatrist

I feel bad about almost everything.

Haven't been working, haven't been studying. Drinking too much. Not making enough of an effort in general.

School's the worst part. Just don't know if I have it in me anymore, which seems weak.

Oh well, face the music.

Abilify

So, I finally started on abilify.

But the dose is low: 5 mg. I was hoping I'd feel different right away, but it's hard to tell. Maybe once I have my blood levels up. Maybe when we up the dose.

Still, the promise of no more seroquel by some point in November is exciting. I'm done with seroquel. The stuff knocks you out. And it's not quite the right drug for my condition, though not so unusual.

But, to be off it, that's the dream.

Days off

Took a couple of days off from blogging.

Needed to unplug, get away (of sorts).

Mostly successful. Saw some movies, read, just relaxed. Alone, which was nice.

Aside from locking myself out again yesterday.

But all is well. Brother had the spare set. Good seeing him, even if only for a few minutes.

Saw psychiatrist--no big changes, just tweaking the meds. wanted to start on abilify, but no dice. not stable enough yet. Maybe in 5 weeks.

Saw psychologist, Jeffery. Good man, that one.

Talked about the job loss and strategies. Going to the union first. I'm in good standings, and what I hope is they can file a greavence and that will keep it going for a couple of days.

I just want to make things difficult for him.

God, how upsetting.